1. Don’t expect to be rescued
3. No one is going to teach you how, so observe, learn, and apply.
4. The world may not be fair but that doesn’t mean you can’t be. End of the day it is you looking in the mirror and that’s where you have to measure up.
5. You will be judged, by courts, cps, workers, teachers, doctors, family, employers, if you can stand up to your own scrutiny you will endure theirs.
6. It’s OK to cry when you get a breather but not while the house is burning.
7. Build a support network but realise they won’t stick around. Overtime it will change. Not just as people leave, but needs change.
10. Therapists, lawyers, doctors, support workers, have preventative benefits if visited earlier rather than later. Obtaining advice does not indicate a lack of intelligence or skill.
11. The world will not quietly repeat itself until you get the message, listen closely before the stack of cards fall to know where the slip has started or you will be picking up cards.
12. If the world has to repeat itself its a deafening shout.
13. No one else has been the parent to this child before you, on this child you are the expert so be the expert.
14. Think first then act a delayed considered response is more valuable than an emotional one.
15. People are arseholes. Particularly those who think they are nice.
16. Contrary to what you may be told it is perfectly reasonable for “No” to be the default answer until convinced otherwise.
17. Only you are responsible for the quality of what you know and understand.
18. Protection of children is not the duty of Child protective services. Lack of custodial parental protection is exclusively the interest of child protective services. Foster care is not protection, it’s last resort.
19. The Court exists to protect us, do not fear the Court.
20. You may not agree with what others say but they have a right to say it then you have the right to thoroughly disprove it.
21. It is not abuse to squash ignorance and myths with facts. It is abuse to hide or deny the truth.
22. Not all support has your perceived label and a neon sign saying ‘ask here’.
23. When asking a question, ask more than once of multiple people then sift for the truth.
24. There is always someone above to take it to.
25. Question everything and everyone. Naivety is self inflicted.
26. Authority is never absolute, if someone claims authority know their limits.
27. If you are within a process, learn the process, rights, authorities, and responsibilities.
28. Report everything
29. Be patient.
30. Nothing worth doing is done fast.
31. True wisdom lies in knowing that you know nothing.
32. Falling is terrifying, it’s perfectly OK to be scared.
33. You can only fall as far as the ground. It’s perfectly fine when you hit the deck to catch your breath and take a moment. Just don’t unpack and live there and whatever you do don’t start digging.